Throwback Thursday: When I knew what I was doing.

I can teach.  I never worry about working with my students.  We (mostly) get along.  I might go to work stressed, but once my students walk into my room, my heart is happy.

The rest of being a special education teacher (AKA due process/paper work)...wow.

Sure, I can write PLAAFPs and Goals.  In fact, I think I am pretty good at those things.  In Utah, I could whip up a great IEP in just a few days.

BUT, did you know that IEP "rules" change depending on where you are?  Sure, I know that everyone has their own formatting, but things are so different here in Minnesota that I feel like I am a first year teacher all over again.  It's pretty much the worst.

I went to a meeting after school today and so much of what they said went over my head.  There are new words, even more dates that I have to make sure are met, and a PLAAFP for every single goal.  The hardest part - I have IEP's coming up for kids that I have only known for a month and don't even see everyday.

So, today, I miss teaching in Utah.

I miss having a relationship with each of my students and their families.  I even got to know students before they were in my class and that made the start of every new year so much easier.  I miss going to birthday parties.  I miss the days when I could invite my students and their families to my wedding and to my brother's fundraiser.  I miss not being worried that parents would abuse having my cell number.  As much as I miss those things though, I know that those kids and their families will always be a part of my life.  And for that I am so grateful.

In Utah, I got to teach with my best friend - we tackled so many situations together and gained a lot of respect within the district.  We were power teachers.

Most of all - I miss knowing what I was doing in an IEP!  I led those meetings with confidence.  I felt so productive!  After four years of teaching, I had it figured out.

I know I will figure it out, get the hang of the silly way things are laid out here (it is seriously so hard to decipher the IEP's).  I will learn why we have a meeting date AND a start date.  I will get used to going into an IEP meeting without an actual IEP in hand.

Good thing I still love being a teacher!